Before Picture (Video)

Enough is enough! My body has been a Science experiment for too long! In the process of killing the cancer, I have been fed steroids. I wish I could blame my weight gain solely and completely on the steroids, but the fact of the matter is, I ate and ate and ate and ate.

"The most common complaint of breast cancer survivors is weight gain," Laurie assures me. It's one of those DANG it!!! myths about cancer. One of the things I was (in a twisted sort of way) looking forward too was getting thin. Oh, but I was deceived! Due to the immense amount of pain that the chemotherapy causes, a VERY strong steroid is given to patients. BUMMER! Add the everything tastes like poo except Werther's Coffee Candies, Mom's cast iron skillet fried in butter potatoes & macaroni and tomatoes...AND YOU get to be 188.2 pounds of pure LOVE!

I may have lost most coping skills during this fight, but I have learned to use a little laughter to keep me from being taken in a pink straight jacket to Shoal Creek. Honestly, I have had such a hard time looking in the mirror. I shower in the dark and work very hard to put make-up on without a mirror. My hair looks like a puppy dog. I've worn more hats, beenies, and scarves than I did when I was completely bald! I'm officially a size 18! YIKES!

"Let's take care of your body and healing before we worry about your weight." I've heard that from EVERY single doctor. There is a point in which a woman needs to take the bull by the horns and defeat it! I have done EVERYTHING the doctors have told me. This is the first time I have gone against there advice. I am woman, hear me ROAR!

WE have started Weight Watchers! Don't worry, I am NOT Cybil! My Besty, Rachel and I have started WW together. I don't have the monetary means to pay $40 a month for the meetings, so we are meeting every Friday morning for weigh in. Yesterday was weigh in. 188.2 pounds....It has been hard for me to hold back from inserting whatever I want into my pie hole whenever I want! Rachel is so excited, so it is inspiring me to stay on track. She is CrAzY MaD excited! Each time I want to put a naughty in my mouth, I just imagine her Kool-Aid Kid Shining Up the Entire House grin. Her Little Girl Shrieking with Glee echoes in my head. Then, I can say no. I just LOVE HER! She helped me shop for good low point foods. Anytime I want to buy a naughty high point food, I just shoot my left ring finger at it and say, "My husband and I are worth more than you!"

Rachel and I decided that we are worth the rewards too! So, I will be bringing our bookmarks to the next meeting. We WILL be earning stickers for each 5 pounds lost. When we meet our 10% goal, we are going to Wonderful Things in Georgetown to buy ourselves a Brighton Charm for $10! Fun TIMES!

Here are the facts. My personal goal is to be able to wear my wedding band and engagement ring again. I need to lose 53.2 pounds. My ten percent goal is 18.8 pounds. My ultimate weight goal is 135 pounds. So, I have a good fight ahead of me considering I MUST eat protein EVERY time I eat...Doctor's orders!

I am still taking steroids, so that is a little challenge. Then there is the I am still healing from a hysterectomy challenge. I LAUGH IN THE FACE OF CHALLENGES! I have opened my entire heart and life here on this blog. I needed a 'before' picture. That just didn't seem like enough for me. So, here I am with my round, bumpy and lumpy body singing my 'before song'.

I don't know how long it will take me to get to my goal. I don't care right now. Any of my students will tell you, "The process is more important than the product!" I shall eat my words, why not? words are 0 POINTS! I'll let y'all know my progress here and there. I wonder what my song will be when I am curvalicious?

P.S. Sorry it is sideways, but I don't know how to fix it. The screen on the left of me holds ALL of the cards of LOVE and encouragement y'all have sent. THANK YOU!